Endings don’t feel end-like

Endings don’t feel end-like

Because they don’t feel any different 

from doing.

If there were less doing 

Before the ending,

Maybe I would have time to 

Make the ending 

End

In a way that didn’t feel 

Abrupt

Or

Empty

Or 

Gaping.

It doesn’t feel like the end

Until after

The end. 

The flurry of doing

Creates a blizzard

So deep

And so dark

That finding guideposts to signal the end

Is almost

Impossible

The more the flurry,

The bigger the blizzard,

The emptier the end. 

Regret

Takes no prisoners

(Honestly,

Regret is a greedy bitch.)

No one can do all the doing,

But Regret

Makes us think we can,

We should, and 

How dare we not?

Each doing left undone

Demands 

Gnaws

At what is already 

Empty.

No one can go back

To a doing.

No one can relive

The doings 

That filled all of the empty spaces

Full up

And made the memory of emptiness

Disappear.

They say that 

Drinking alcohol

Or salt water

When there is no fresh water

Uses more water than it gives you

It takes

More than it gives.

Have you ever tried to go 

Back?

Don’t drink the salt water. 

You can try, 

But you’ll be left 

Emptier.

Sometimes, 

It seems best to just

Avoid 

The end.

To walk away.

Walk off the cliff. 

What Good

Would it do to look behind?

Ignoring the end

Seems easier

Ignore the emotions

Ignore the empty

Ignoring

Seems easier

Ignoring 

Makes it harder 

To feel

The more you ignore

The less you feel

It changes

All of the doing

Not just the end.